Thursday, July 29, 2010
One's Self Observed.
I really am at a constant war with myself. The more I think, it seems, the less I truly know. I haven't quite decided if I'm too over analytical or if I'm too impulsive. Honestly, I'm pretty sure I'm both. I'm not quite sure how that works. I get lost inside my own head so much, you'd think I'd know me pretty well by now. But, I still learn knew things about myself in the weirdest ways. I haven't quite decided if I'm too honest about myself, or if I'm not honest enough. Sometimes, I think I'm the only one I'm lying to. I'm so fucking indecisive about everything. Especially how I feel about others. That's the real grey area here. Sometimes, I can't get enough of someone, yet sometimes, I feel like I can't get away from them quick enough. I will, at times, feel like I care too much for someone, and get stupid about it and tell them everything. I believe that life would be so much easier if I could just remain unattached from all that surrounds me, and subject myself to it at my own will. But alas, it's not. I care too much for people, usually the wrong ones, and I always find a way to make it interesting. And by make it interesting, I mean fuck it up.